“MARIE”
*silence*
“MARIE”
*silence*
“MARIE”
“ARE YOU CALLING ME FRANKIE?”
“WHERE’S THE TOOTHPASTE?”
“THE WHAT?”
“THE TOOTHPASTE”
“THE FOOD WASTE?”
“NO THE TOOTHPASTE”
How have I ended up here? I thought I would never have to live with my parents again. Every morning I am woken by the sound of my lovely parents shouting to each other from opposite ends of the house. This usually goes on for a few minutes until Frankie finds the toothpaste in the same spot it is always in beside the sink. I was not raised in a house where indoor voices were used. They simply did not exist.
When I finally roll out of bed I am greeted by my mother lapping the house, swinging her arms like her life depends on it trying to get in her morning steps.
“How many are you on now?”
“I’m only at 2,000 steps yet, I think we are going to have to do a four mile walk today to make the 10,000.”
I begin the day with a breakfast of either waffles, cinnamon rolls or pancakes and a wee cup of tea. I don’t usually eat this badly for breakfast but I’m in lockdown and I’m sad so I’m going to treat myself! After breakfast I get ready and head out the door with my mother for a walk. We either go to the beach across the road or to the country roads through the hills for our walk. It all depends on how lazy we are feeling and how many steps we want to do that morning. My mother and I both have fitbits, and we are OBSESSED with getting 10,000 steps everyday!
When we return from our walk I usually get conned into helping Mammy because my sisters have ‘online classes’. So far this has consisted of: reorganising and decluttering all the bookshelves in the house, refolding the bedsheets in the hotpress and painting the kitchen cupboards. God forbid something ends up in the wrong place, it would set my mother on a rampage that would put the hulk to shame.
When I am finished painting or reorganising I try to meditate for 15 minutes. I have recently joined a 21 days of abundance meditation challenge. It has been a great way to get into meditation slowly and it has helped me stick to a schedule as I am in a group with others. It is recommended that you listen to the sounds of nature but I usually listen to the sound of my sisters fighting and that works fine for me.
“Where is my ten euro from the time you wore my jumper to the cinema?”
“Cop on, I’m not giving you ten euro.”
“You promised me if I let you wear it you would give me a tenner.”
“Get out of my room.”
“Give me the tenner.”
“Get out of my room.”
“I will once you pay me.”
“MAMMY!”
*incoherent screaming from everyone*
Once the screaming calms down I usually watch a film with the family. We have been watching horror films recently which results in us all being too scared to go to bed so we follow up watching reruns of Brooklyn 99 before we hit the hay.
My final thought before falling asleep is usually: God bless the neighbours who have listened to us all day!
A Problem Like Ellen 